Archive for Choices, decisions and meaning making
Has the Law of Abundance become a Law of Entitlement?
Posted by: | Comments“‘Entitlement’ is not only the opposite of achievement; it undermines incentives to do all the hard work that leads to achievement.” Thomas Sowell
When I was lecturing at a UK university a few years ago a student came up to me at the first session of the semester and said, “Can I get a distinction in this class?”
After clarifying exactly what he meant, that is, could he get a distinction just for showing up I said, “I don’t know. Are you capable of earning a distinction in this class?”
There’s quite a bit of literature out there suggesting that an attitude of entitlement is an affliction of today’s adolesence and individuals in their 20’s. Other literature says that this phenomenon is a predisposition of anyone born from 1970 onward. However, before thinking it’s a generational issue let’s look at some of the characteristics of an entitlement attitude?
Someone with the feeling of entitlement might think or make some or all of the following comments:
- “Everyone else has ‘X’… so I want it too and right now.”
- “If you really loved me….. you’d give me ‘X’ now.”
- “Why should I? What have they done for me?”
- “They, the organization, the government, life owes me something.”
- “I deserve to have it now.”
- “I want more and I want it now.”
- “Someone with my level of education or socio-economic status, should be entitled to ‘X’ (e.g. the best service – whatever the service – now, an abundant lifestyle – now, without having to put a whole lot of effort into creating it).
If these comments are indicators of having a feeling of entitlement (to have or get whatever we want, when we want) then I’d venture to say entitlement isn’t just a generational challenge but fast becoming a societal one.
Well this is all well and good but what’s it got to do with the notion of abundance?
If we believe we’re entitled to an abundant life, whatever that means to each and every one of us, then we may not be willing to put in the effort needed to create that life. If we want it all, then we’d better be prepared to roll up our sleeves and work towards achieving ‘it all’.
It’s about exploring what abundance means for us, whatever that means and then going out and creating it!
“A great source of frustration for people with a strong sense of entitlement is unmet expectations….”[i] Paul Harvey
Life doesn’t always turn out the way we planned on our first, second, third or hundredth attempt. Some individuals we meet along the way aren’t what they initially appear to be. Or we may feel that others, who seem to possess what we desire, have gotten it without much effort on their part; while we diligently persevere with little success.
Creating an abundant life isn’t about expecting any person, institution or windfall to make it happen for us. Life doesn’t owe us anything we’re not prepared to work towards.
Creating abundance in your life is about having a clear vision about what you truly want your life to look and feel like and doing whatever needs to be done to attain it!
For those of us who live in developed countries we’re already blessed with so many life-enhancing opportunities and resources. Unfortunately, because they’re so readily available we forget, in the first instance, to be grateful for what we do have. Instead we’ve a tendency to focus on what’s missing rather than the gifts of life that are already all around us.
I’d love to hear your comments about the notion of entitlement.
Until next time, take time to remember all that you have and reach for all that you desire!
[i] http://www.management-issues.com/2009/4/28/research/gen-y-still-think-the-world-owes-them-a-living.asp
What perceptual lens is creating your life – PART II
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In life you interpret your experiences by processing events in order to give them meaning. Do your cookies of interpretation belong to you or someone else?
Our perceptions flow from the way we choose to feel about any life event, which means that our perceptions and feelings become one and the same.
Scenario: You’re all alone in your house. It’s late at night and you hear a creak on the stairs as you lay in bed. The sound instantly fills you with a feeling of dread and anxiety. A feeling attributed to the memory of the three-year-old you when your brother snuck up the stairs late at night and jumped out of the darkness to scare you as you lay helpless in your cot.
A key point to remember is that your current interpretation (perception) of what something (in this instance, a creak on the stairs) means which flows from sensory stimulation (feeling) is primarily based on a memory of that experience.
Put simply, your memories are memories of memories of memories. In the example of the creaking stairs, you’ve isolated in time a feeling of being scared witless, and wrapped it around the experience of your brother jumping out of the darkness.
You have, in other words, chosen to forget or delete all the surrounding circumstances of that experience; like your mother comforting you and making the world feel safe again or your brother being scolded and sent off to bed and the fact that you got cookies and he didn’t.
Perception is the process of translating the senses (sight, touch, feel, taste and smell) into comprehensible experience. And because you don’t witness the process of translating your senses into perception, your interpretations can never be confirmed or denied.
Validating or falsifying the perceptions you hold isn’t particularly important. What is relevant is the awareness that any and all of the perceptual filters you use – based on your unique interpretation of the meaning of events – is only one way to look at life experiences.
Ask yourself: Do the perception(s) I hold about myself and others help me live the life I want to create?
If the answer to that question is NO then you need to shift the perception(s) which prevent you from fully engaging in the creative flow of your unique and meaningful life.
Your perceptions construct the world and your life as you know it. Change your perceptions and your change your life!
When you hold a perception about the way the world works, you tend to gather information which supports your viewpoint.
Your perception, therefore, acts as a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Your perceptions underpin the stories you tell yourself about who you are but mostly who you are not. They are the foundation of how you believe life should be lived.
Question: Is there anything that you perceived/perceive as real that became real but didn’t give you the life you wanted?
I’d love to hear your comments and thoughts about the content of this blog. Until we meet again, have a extraordinary life!
This is a continuation of the previous excerpt from my book Pack Light & Move Towards Your Ideal Life! You can order the book on: http://www.manifestingyourabundance.com/blog/store/
