Archive for Living life to the max
Has the Law of Abundance become a Law of Entitlement?
Posted by: | Comments“‘Entitlement’ is not only the opposite of achievement; it undermines incentives to do all the hard work that leads to achievement.” Thomas Sowell
When I was lecturing at a UK university a few years ago a student came up to me at the first session of the semester and said, “Can I get a distinction in this class?”
After clarifying exactly what he meant, that is, could he get a distinction just for showing up I said, “I don’t know. Are you capable of earning a distinction in this class?”
There’s quite a bit of literature out there suggesting that an attitude of entitlement is an affliction of today’s adolesence and individuals in their 20’s. Other literature says that this phenomenon is a predisposition of anyone born from 1970 onward. However, before thinking it’s a generational issue let’s look at some of the characteristics of an entitlement attitude?
Someone with the feeling of entitlement might think or make some or all of the following comments:
- “Everyone else has ‘X’… so I want it too and right now.”
- “If you really loved me….. you’d give me ‘X’ now.”
- “Why should I? What have they done for me?”
- “They, the organization, the government, life owes me something.”
- “I deserve to have it now.”
- “I want more and I want it now.”
- “Someone with my level of education or socio-economic status, should be entitled to ‘X’ (e.g. the best service – whatever the service – now, an abundant lifestyle – now, without having to put a whole lot of effort into creating it).
If these comments are indicators of having a feeling of entitlement (to have or get whatever we want, when we want) then I’d venture to say entitlement isn’t just a generational challenge but fast becoming a societal one.
Well this is all well and good but what’s it got to do with the notion of abundance?
If we believe we’re entitled to an abundant life, whatever that means to each and every one of us, then we may not be willing to put in the effort needed to create that life. If we want it all, then we’d better be prepared to roll up our sleeves and work towards achieving ‘it all’.
It’s about exploring what abundance means for us, whatever that means and then going out and creating it!
“A great source of frustration for people with a strong sense of entitlement is unmet expectations….”[i] Paul Harvey
Life doesn’t always turn out the way we planned on our first, second, third or hundredth attempt. Some individuals we meet along the way aren’t what they initially appear to be. Or we may feel that others, who seem to possess what we desire, have gotten it without much effort on their part; while we diligently persevere with little success.
Creating an abundant life isn’t about expecting any person, institution or windfall to make it happen for us. Life doesn’t owe us anything we’re not prepared to work towards.
Creating abundance in your life is about having a clear vision about what you truly want your life to look and feel like and doing whatever needs to be done to attain it!
For those of us who live in developed countries we’re already blessed with so many life-enhancing opportunities and resources. Unfortunately, because they’re so readily available we forget, in the first instance, to be grateful for what we do have. Instead we’ve a tendency to focus on what’s missing rather than the gifts of life that are already all around us.
I’d love to hear your comments about the notion of entitlement.
Until next time, take time to remember all that you have and reach for all that you desire!
[i] http://www.management-issues.com/2009/4/28/research/gen-y-still-think-the-world-owes-them-a-living.asp
WHAT WILL THE HYPHEN OF YOUR LIFE MEAN
Posted by: | Comments“If I am not for myself, then who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, then what am I? And if not now, when?” Rabbi Hillel, born 1st century BCE
Although this may sound macabre to some when I lived in the UK I loved to visit churchyards and wander about looking at the inscriptions on the graves. It was fascinating how you could glean the history of families that once were but were no longer. For instance I could tell by the death dates of the children which families had lived during epidemics of typhoid, small pox and plagues. From those dates I’d also know during which periods of time those fatal diseases had swept through whatever village or town I was visiting.
I could also tell the men who had lost first wives (often in childbirth) and remarried because in a lot of instances both women were buried with their man. And often I could tell the men and women had lost their lives to war and which war it was.
However, the suppositions and guess work I drew from the dates of the tombstones was all that I could tell about the lives of those individuals who had lived years, decades and even centuries before.
The only thing I knew for sure was when they were born and when they died. I really had no idea what had gone on between their birth and death. What their dreams, their goals and aspirations, their grand passions, their day-to-day existence, their legacy had been. Or how they had walked the planet and what meaning they’d placed on and given to life? The dynamics of their lives, the space and time between when they were born and when they died was simply represented by the small and often illegible hyphen or dash between those dates.
I remember sitting beneath the lushness of a sprawling ancient oak, somewhere in the heart of Derbyshire, after visiting a churchyard and reflecting on what the hyphen between my date of birth and death would mean or more specifically what meaning I would give it.
What’s important isn’t when we enter or exit our life. It’s the vibrant expression of our life, the bit in the middle that’s abbreviated by the dash on our tombstones or crypts.
So the question I ask is this: Will that simple dash be coloured with passion, purpose, meaning, and enthusiasm or will it be painted with monochromatic shades of getting by and the status quo.
Each of us comes into this world to shine our own particular expressive light. No one else can live life as we can because they’re simply not us. We have a responsibility to shine our light as brightly as we can, to live life as only we can live it.
Our brightness, fully expressed acts as a beacon for others. So live your passions and your dreams with meaningful purpose and enthusiasm.
The questions I remind myself of when it would be easier to sink into the woodwork of mediocrity rather than taking the focused time and energy to shine my light as brilliantly as I might are these:
If not now when?
If not me who?
